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.Now it was time to get her own life in order.First things first.She had an apartment, and the little square of lawnoutside the glass doors was going to make her happy.That in itself was achallenge.Her old condo had been centrally located on the fifth floor ofa fully maintained modern building.This charming and older development was a good thirty miles fromdowntown, but she could hear the birds in the morning.She would beable to look out at old oaks and sweeping maples and flowers she wouldplant herself.Perhaps it wasn t as big a change as a flight to Paris, butfor Rebecca it was a statement.She d bought some furniture.Some was the operative word.Thus farshe d picked out a bed, one antique table and a single chair.Not logical, Rebecca thought with a faint smile.No proper andeconomical living room suite, no tidy curtains.Even the single set oftowels she d bought was frivolous.And exactly what she d wanted.Shewould do what she d secretly wanted to do for years buy a piece here,a piece there.Not because it was a good buy or durable, but because shewanted it. She wondered how many people would really understand thesatisfaction of making decisions not because they were sensible butbecause they were desirable.She d done it with her home, her wardrobe.Even with her hair, shethought, running a hand through it.Outward changes had led to innerchanges.Or vice versa.Either way, she would never again be thewoman she d been before.Or perhaps she would be the woman she d always been but hadrefused to acknowledge.Then why was she circling ads in the classifieds? Rebecca askedherself.Why was she sitting here on a beautiful morning planning afuture she had no interest in? Perhaps it was true that she would neverhave the one thing, the one person, she really wanted.There would be nomore picnics or walks in the moonlight or frantic nights in bed.Still, shehad the memories, she had the moments, she had the dreams.Therewould be no regrets where Stephen was concerned.Not now, and notever.And if she was now more the woman she had been with him, it hadtaken more than a change in hairstyle.She was stronger.She was surer.She was freer.And she d done itherself.She could think of nothing she wanted less than to go back intosomeone else s firm, tallying figures, calculating profit and loss.So shewouldn t.Rebecca sank into the chair as the thought struck home.She wouldn t.She wouldn t go job hunting, carrying her resume,rinsing sweaty palms in the rest room, putting her career and life insomeone else s hands again.She d open her own firm.A small one,certainly.Personalized.Exclusive, she decided, savoring the word.Whynot? She had the skill, the experience, and finally she had thecourage.It wouldn t be easy.In fact, it would be risky.The money she had leftwould have to go toward renting office space, equipment, a phonesystem, advertising.With a bubbling laugh, she sprang up and searchedfor a legal pad and a pencil.She had to make lists not only of things todo but of people to call.She had enough contacts from her McDowell, Jableki and Kline days.Maybe, just maybe, she could persuade some ofher former clients to give her a try. Just a minute, she called out when she heard the knock on the door.She scribbled a reminder to look for file cabinets as she went to answer.She d much rather have some good solid oak file cabinets than a livingroom sofa.She knew better than to open the door without checking the securitypeephole, but she was much too involved with her plans to think aboutsuch things.When she opened the door, she found herself face-to-facewith Stephen.Even if she could have spoken, he wasn t in the mood to let her. What in the hell do you think you re doing? he demanded as heslammed the door behind him. Do you deliberately try to drive me mad,or does it come naturally to you? I I don t But he was already yanking her against him.Whatever words she might have spoken dissolved into a moan againsthis lips.Her pad fell to the floor with a slap.Even as her arms came uparound him he was thrusting her away. What kind of game are you playing, Rebecca? When she just shookher head, he dug his hands into his pockets and paced the wide, nearlyempty room.He was unshaven, disheveled and absolutely gorgeous. It s taken me two weeks and a great deal of trouble to find you.Ibelieve we d agreed to talk again.I was surprised to discover you d notonly left Athens, but Europe. He swung back and pinned her with alook. Why? Still reeling from his entrance, she struggled not to babble. I thoughtit best that I leave. You thought? He took a step toward her, his fury so palatable thatshe braced herself. You thought it best, he repeated. For whom? For you.For both of us. She caught herself fiddling with the lapelsof her robe and dropped her hands. I knew you were angry with me forlying to you and that you regretted what had happened between us.I feltit would be better for both of us if I Ran away? Her chin came up fractionally. Went away. You said you loved me. She swallowed. I know. Was that another lie? Please don t. She turned away, but there was nowhere to go. Stephen, I never expected to see you again.I m trying to make somesense out of my life, to do things in a way that s not only right butmakes me happy.In Greece, I guess, I did what made me happy, but Ididn t think about what was right.The time with you was & Was what? Dragging both hands through her hair, she turned to him again.It wasas if the two weeks had never been.She was facing him again, trying toexplain what she feared she could never explain. It was the best thingthat ever happened to me, the most important, the most unforgettable,the most precious.I ll always be grateful for those few days. Grateful. He wasn t sure whether to laugh or murder her.Steppingforward, he surprised them both by slipping his hands lightly around herthroat. For what? For my giving you your first fling? A fast,anonymous romance with no consequences? No. She lifted a hand to his wrist but made no attempt to struggle. Did you come all this way to make me feel more guilty? I came all this way because I finish what I begin.We d far fromfinished, Rebecca. All right. Be calm, she told herself.When a man was this close tothe edge, a woman s best defense was serenity. If you ll let me go,we ll talk.Would you like some coffee? His fingers tightened reflexively, then slowly relaxed. You vebought a new pot. Yes. Was that humor in his eyes? she wondered. There s only onechair.Why don t you use it while I go into the kitchen? He took her arm. I don t want coffee, or a chair, or a pleasantconversation. It seemed serenity wouldn t work. All right, Stephen.What do youwant? You.I d thought I d made that fairly obvious. When she frowned,he glanced around the apartment. Now tell me, Rebecca, is this whatyou want? A handful of rooms to be alone in? I want to make the best of the rest of my life
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